I know her birthday was two months ago, but I needed time to sit down, think clearly, and form a letter that would do my heart justice (hard!).
Dear Hannah girl,
Sometimes I find myself looking at you and thinking…I can’t believe you’re so big. Yes, all mommies talk like that. But I’m referring to those times when it’s like, all of a sudden, I realize – hey, my baby girl is not a baby. You are your own person, with your own personality, your very own thoughts and opinions, and your own wishes and dreams. And you are a gift. You are a precious gift. And, as always, “I just love you so much.” It wasn’t so long ago when I’d rock you as a baby and just cry, amazed, and all I could say to your daddy was “I just love her so much.”
There are moments like this…
when you’re cuddled up next to me for quiet time and figuring things out and I realize – there are lots of things you can do all by yourself. You don’t need me for everything.
And there are moments like this…
when you’re on Daddy’s lap in the car and I realize – you’ve done this for three years now…and you’re not just playing with knobs and buttons, but actually steering the car up the driveway and into the carport!
And there are moments like this…
when you walk up the aisle with your Daddy on Sundays and I realize – I don’t know who loves and treasures it more. {I am thankful to Mrs. Pat who caught this on camera. Joseph and I don’t see you from the back of the church because we are already seated in the pew.}
These pictures are just a few examples of times I hold dear. Most moments with you are like that. Obviously there are times when you drive me mad, but usually you are a sweet girl.
You are always busy – running around the backyard with your brother, cooking something up in your kitchen, dressing up, or playing with your train…just to name a few. Checking the mail, going for walks, watering the flowers, and running errands, you delight in the everyday things. I love that about you. You continue to have a very active and creative sense of imagination and I love to listen over the monitor and peek from your doorway during quiet time.
You’re a busy monkey, for sure, and you are growing and changing every day. You say the funniest things, and sometimes you just plain shock me. You can outsmart me and you have a really good memory. Your choice of words can make me laugh out loud or infuriate me. They can also make me melt, like when you whisper secrets in my ear or say “Momma, do you realize that I love you and you’re my best friend?” and “I’ll always be your little baby” when I say to stop growing up so fast.
You call for family “group hugs”, help set the table, and feed and play with Mollie. You are a helper, an encourager, and a cheerleader. You are a great nurse, and did such a good job taking care of Daddy after his accident. You are a loving and responsible member of our family, and are very happy to be right where you are. In filling out a list of your favorite things recently, you answered that your favorite place was “right here. home.” My heart exploded. Me, too, baby.
You are four now! This was by far the most anticipated birthday yet and in conversation “when I was 3” is a common way you organize time. You were a fancy, fancy birthday girl and your party was worth every minute spent planning and getting ready. You are fancy and continue to humor me in your outfit selections and with your personality.
You are a cute monkey, beautiful if you ask Daddy and me. But way more important than that, you are beautiful on the inside. You love Jesus and talk about Him often. It is very important to you to have Him “in your heart.” My biggest hope, dream, and prayer is for you to always be that way – loving Jesus more than anything in the world. Daddy and I are so thankful to God for giving you to us. I treasure these years we have together, and am loving this age. I just have to remind myself to slow down and just enjoy each day. It does go by so fast…
Thank you for the joy and love you bring to me and to this family. I love you forever.
xoxo,
Momma
Love this Lindsey. So, so beautiful. I love your writing.
Thank you Michelle! It's hard to find the time to sit down and write, but I know I will be glad to look back on it…and read it to my babies.